Strawberry jam

There were too many strawberries at the allotment again - and this time they were a bit squishy. So we made some jam, to eat with croissants at breakfast.

This makes 3-4 jars (standard jam/marmalade size of about 454g), and is dead easy. You'll need:

850g strawberries, hulled and washed
1 kg jam sugar (the sort with added pectin in - if you've only got ordinary sugar, add the juice of a lemon instead)

You'll need to wash 3-4 glass jars thoroughly in hot soapy water, and then place them on a tray in a low oven to keep warm. (Using them straight from the dishwasher also works.) Remember to stick a small plate in the fridge - you'll need it later on.

Tip the strawberries into a large pan, and attack with a potato masher until you have a glorious-smelling pulp that looks like something out of a horror movie. Warm on a low heat, and then tip in the jam sugar. Stir until it's dissolved.

Bring the mixture slowly to the boil, stirring all the time so the sugar doesn't catch on the bottom of the pan. Now you need to reach a 'rolling boil' (when the mixture is bubbling away, and keeps doing so even if you stir it). Keep the jam at a rolling boil for 4 minutes, then quickly dab a small bit onto a cold plate (that's the one you put in the fridge at the beginning of the process), and see if it wrinkles when you push it with your finger. If it does, you're in business - retrieve your jars from the oven, and decant the jam into them.

Screw the lids on, and then leave to cool on the worktop. Don't worry if you hear popping noises about half an hour later - it'll be the little vacuum disc in the top of the lid popping out.

Strawberry ice cream

After eating strawberries for breakfast, lunch and tea we threw in the towel and made something that would keep for a while.

You'll need:

a large punnet of strawberries, washed and hulled
a 300ml carton of double or whipping cream
100g caster sugar

If you're using an ice cream machine like ours, don't forget to put the bowl in the freezer the night before...

Sling the strawberries and sugar in a liquidiser/blender. Whizz round until you have a lovely smooth strawberry puree. Tip in the cream, and mix the two together.

Decant into your ice cream maker, and follow the instructions. Ours is a bit rubbish and threatens to overheat after about 45 minutes of churning, so I tend to decant it into a tub and stick in the freezer for a final burst until it's properly set and frozen.

This time I had so much mixture that I also made one batch solely in the freezer - just remember to come back every hour or two and give it a good stir to get rid of any ice crystals.

Strawberry smoothie

We have more strawberries on the allotment than we know what to do with, so we've started eating them for breakfast. You like this smoothie a lot, because it's pink...

Makes enough for 1 (adult). You'll need:

1 small banana banana (the riper the better)
a handful of ripe strawberries, hulled
a tablespoon of yoghurt
3 or 4 ice cubes

Stick everything in a blender. Whizz around until the ice has been crushed, and everything has turned a glorious pink. If you're making it for a little one, don't bother with the ice cubes - just dilute with a little cold water.

Strawberry, pineapple and marshmallow skewers

You saw these in a freebie supermarket magazine, and were desperate to try them out. You weren't disappointed.

You'll need:

strawberries (enough for 4 or 5 per person)
chunks of fresh pineapple (enough for 4 or 5 per person)
marshmallows (enough for a couple per person, depending on how much of a sugar fiend you are)
dark chocolate, to melt

Thread the fruit and marshmallows onto wooden skewers in a pretty pattern. Place a little chocolate in a ramekin dish, and carefully heat in the microwave, until it melts.

Dip fruit/skewer in chocolate. Eat quickly before anyone else can.

You could also put these on the bbq, if you're a fan of squidgy marshmallows - the pineapple would char nicely. Just don't forget to soak the skewers in water first.

Strawberry ice cream lollies

You were responsible for most of this (apart from whipping the cream) - and had great fun tasting the mixture at different stages...

It made enough to fill 6 small ice lolly moulds, and 4 silicon cupcake moulds (for the grownups).

You'll need:

30g white caster sugar
250ml whipping cream
130g strawberry jam (whisked, so there's no large lumps)
50g fresh strawberries, hulled
a few pistachio nuts, crushed

Chop your strawberries into small chunks, and then roll in the caster sugar. Whip the cream until it's fairly stiff, and then fold in the strawberry jam. Chuck in the strawberries, and carefully fold into the mix.

Stuff the creamy mixture into the ice lolly moulds (we did this with a couple of teaspoons, but you'd probably get even better results if you used a piping bag). If you want to make some ice cream cupcakes, line some small silicon cupcake moulds with cling film, fill with the creamy mixture, and then wrap the cling film over the top.

Stick everything in the freezer - it'll probably take 3-4 hours to freeze properly. Slide the lollies out by running a little hot water over them, or warming the mould in your hands. The cupcakes are dead easy - just unwrap the cling film, and place on a plate.

You could also use raspberries/raspberry jam, or glace cherries/berry jam for a real sugar hit. The lollies are gorgeous dipped in crushed pistachio nuts, or chocolate vermicelli...

A 3rd birthday party

You insisted on a 'strawberry party' this year, so we tried to make all the food as red as possible...

You'll need 8 small people to dance like dervishes to musical bumps and musical statues, while you assemble the following on the dining room table:

a large tub of baby tomatoes
a red pepper, sliced
babybels - one for each child to stop any arguments
strawberries, natch
red pizza (we had salami, tomato and mozarella - I was going to make it, but frankly life's too short when you've got a cake to ice as well, so Somerfield catered)
Tunnocks tea cakes
Hula Hoops (so everyone could wear them on their fingers)
jam tarts
Iced Gems (it really isn't a birthday party without these)

We had a red tablecloth on the table, red straws to drink the orange juice through, and lots of strawberry-coloured balloons (as well as some home-made bunting).

And, obviously, the piece de resistance - a strawberry cake.

Strawberry tea (scones)

It poured down all day, so this afternoon we opened up a strawberry tea cafe. We made scones, and wrote an extensive menu (strawberry tea, strawberry lunch, drinks) which was decorated with drawings of strawberries. You dressed up as a waitress with a frilly apron and took the orders with a notebook and pencil.

Here's the scones (another one of Grandma's recipes), which we ate with strawberry jam, squirty cream (Shaun the Sheep has a lot to answer for), and a pile of real strawberries.

1lb self-raising flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
40z butter
40z sugar
a couple of handfuls of raisins
1/2 pt milk
a little extra milk to brush the tops with (possibly your favourite bit)

Bung the oven on at 200 degrees.

Stick the flour and salt in a bowl. You should probably sift them, but I never bother. Life's too short. Rub in the butter until the mixture looks like very fine breadcrumbs. Stir in the sugar.

Add the milk, to make a soft but not sticky dough (you might not need to add it all - I didn't today). Turn out the dough onto a floured surface, and knead slightly. Roll out to 1/2 inch thick, and then get going with the cutters (we made traditional round scones today, and also a few heart-shaped ones). Brush the top with a little milk.

Shove into the oven for 10-15 minutes until well-risen, or golden brown. Cool on a wire rack. If you're lucky, I might buy you a three-tier stacking one like mine one day...