Chocolate tart

With optional Easter chicks. 'Scuse the bad photo, but it was taken after a couple of glasses of fizz, and the phone was wobbling slightly.

You made this for your chocaholic Grandma for Easter Sunday lunch - we took it with us as a surprise. She wasn't allowed to look at it until all the chicks had been carefully placed on top.

It's based on a lovely Rachel Allen recipe from her Bake collection, and serves...well, that all depends on how greedy you are. We comfortably got 12 portions from it.

You'll need:

shortcrust pastry (8oz flour usually gives enough to line a 20cm flan dish, plus a little left over for 4 or 5 jam tarts)

125g milk chocolate, chopped into small pieces
175g dark chocolate (ditto)
2 eggs (beaten)
175ml double cream
125ml milk

Stick your oven on at about 180 degrees C, and grease your flan dish. Line with shortcrust pastry, prick the bottom with a fork, and then weight down a sheet of greaseproof paper with some baking beads or lentils/rice etc. Bake the pastry shell in the oven for 12-15 minutes, until it's turned golden brown.

In the meantime, mix together the cream and milk in a saucepan, and bring to boiling point. Quickly take it off the heat, and tip in the small pieces of chocolate (taking care to test a few on the way). Stir until they have dissolved, and you have a glorious creamy, glossy, chocolate-y sauce.

Leave to cool slightly, then carefully mix in the eggs. Pour the mixture into the pastry shell, and bake in the oven for 15-20 minutes - you want it to just softly set. If you leave it to cool in the tin, it'll be much easier to extract.

Chocolate chip cookies

Be warned. These are spreaders...

Makes about 12 (very very) large ones. You'll need:

100g dark chocolate
125g butter
100g granulated sugar
75g soft brown sugar
1 egg
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
150g plain flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder

Stick the oven on at about 190 degrees C, and line your baking tray (essential).

First of all, chop up your chocolate into small chunks. You might like to cheat, and buy some chocolate chips, as this takes a while - but Sainsbury's value dark chocolate is only 27p a bar. You win some, you lose some.

Bung the butter into a small saucepan, and gently melt. Pour the sugar into a mixing bowl, then add the melted butter, and beat together. It'll look extremely strange, but go with it.

Sling the egg and vanilla essence in, and beat well again. Gradually add the flour and baking powder, then stir in the chopped up chunks of chocolate. Dollop some spoonfuls of this onto your baking tray A LONG WAY APART.

Bake in the oven for 8-10 minutes, until the cookies turn golden brown. Whip them out, then leave to cool on the baking tray for a couple of minutes, until they start to harden. You can then sling them onto a cooling rack.

Keeps for a week or so in an airtight tin. Like that will happen.

Halloween spider cakes

Needless to say, these disappeared very very quickly...

Makes around 12 really large cupcakes. You'll need:

3oz butter
2oz dark chocolate
1 tablespoon milk
8oz self-raising flour
1/2 teaspoon bicarb of soda
3oz light muscovado sugar
2oz caster sugar
150ml cream

And for the spiders:

12 prunes
24 silver balls
lots of liquorice laces
a little white icing (mix together a scant amount of warm water and lots of icing sugar)

Stick the oven on at about 180 degrees C, and line a muffin tin with 12 cases.

Melt the chocolate, butter and milk together in a small saucepan over a low heat. Leave to cool slightly.

Mix together the flour, bicarb and sugar (both lots). Then beat the egg and cream together, and slowly add to the flour mixture. Pour over the cooled chocolate/butter mix. It'll look terrible...but don't worry, just stir a little (but not too much).

Spoon into your paper/silicon cases, and bake for about 20 minutes in the oven until they've risen (and they rise a lot).

Leave to cool on a wire rack. Once cool, spread icing on the top, and assemble your spiders. Eat with gusto.

Banana skewers

I should have photographed these because they were fantastic, and you were so proud of them. Next time...

Makes enough for 3. You'll need

a couple of bananas, roughly cut into large slices
straws (or skewers - but straws are easier if you're only small)
100g (ish) of chocolate, preferably dark
a couple of tablespoons of dessicated coconut on a small plate

Break the chocolate into small pieces, and place in a small bowl. Stick in the microwave for short intervals (eg 15s) until the chocolate is melted - it helps if you keep stirring it in between the bursts.

Thread your banana piece on a straw/skewer. Drizzle over the melted chocolate, then roll the whole thing over the coconut so it sticks to the chocolate.

Stand each straw/skewer in a glass, and leave to harden. Eat as quickly as possible, so no one can pinch yours.

Chocodoodles

It's been rather a strange, grumpy day, so we made chocodoodles (little chocolate biscuits/cakes) to cheer ourselves up. It's a Nigella recipe, slightly tweaked - we ate them with slices of juicy nectarine, and will finish the rest off with the blackberry mountain currently sitting at the bottom of the fridge.

Makes about 16. You'll need:

65g butter
50g sugar
25g cocoa powder
100g plain flour
a pinch of salt
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
a small egg
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 tablespoon caster sugar
1/2 tablespoon cinnamon

Stick the oven on at about 180 degrees C, and fish out a baking tray (you'll need to line it with greaseproof paper or a silicon sheet).

Cream the butter and sugar (50g, not the tablespoon) together, until they're fluffy. A bit of elbow grease works wonders, but you could cheat and do this in the food processor. Beat in the egg and vanilla extract, and then carefully add the cocoa powder, and mix gently. Add the flour, baking powder and salt, and mix until everything is smooth.

Mix the remaining caster sugar/cinnamon, and place on a plate. Take a teaspoon of mixture, roll it in your fingers to make a ball, and then roll each ball on the cinnamony/sugary plate until it's thoroughly covered. (You loved this bit.)

Sling each ball on the baking tray (they don't spread too much while baking, so you don't have to space them widely), and bake in the oven for about 15 minutes until no longer soft. Leave to cool on a wire rack.

Chocolate puddings

To celebrate our return from sunny France to rainy Gateshead we made chocolate puddings for tea.

Makes four small puddings - they were brilliant with blackberries from the allotment, and a scoop of ice cream.

You'll need:

50g butter
50g sugar
1 egg
2 tablespoons cocoa powder
50g self-raising flour

Stick the oven on at about 180 degrees C. You'll need four little ramekin dishes, or something similar that's oven proof. The puddings stuck slightly to my glass dishes, so make sure to butter them well.

Cream the butter and sugar together, then beat in the egg (you could do all this in the food processor, to speed things up). Add the cocoa powder, and gently mix (if you're overenthusiastic it tends to erupt in powdery clouds all over the kitchen flour). Ditto with the flour.

Divide the mixture into the four dishes, and place on a baking tray (this makes it easier to get them in and out of the oven). Bake for 15-20 minutes, until they've risen, and are firm to the touch.

Eat rapidly - they're better warm than cold.

Millie's chocolate and banana pots

You made these all by yourself - you did all the chopping, and the wrapping of everything in foil.

Makes enough for three. You'll need:

3 glass ramekins
a couple of bananas
whatever leftover chocolate you can find (ours was the remnants of the Easter hoard)
a handful of cranberries/raisins
a splash of rum or orange juice

Stick the oven on at about 180 degrees C.

Peel the bananas, and chop into small(ish) rings. Place on the bottom of the ramekin dishes. Smash up all the chocolate you can find, and divvy up evenly between the pots. Sprinkle over whatever dried fruit you fancy (cranberries or raisins are good).

If the pot is for a grownup, they'll appreciate a splash of rum in the bottom. Children can stick to a slurp of orange juice.

Cover the pots with foil, sling them on an oven tray (makes it much easier to get them in and out of the oven), and put them in the oven while you eat the first part of your tea - they need about 15-20 minutes.

Take the foil off carefully, and then serve with a dollop of creme fraiche, or ice cream.

Strawberry, pineapple and marshmallow skewers

You saw these in a freebie supermarket magazine, and were desperate to try them out. You weren't disappointed.

You'll need:

strawberries (enough for 4 or 5 per person)
chunks of fresh pineapple (enough for 4 or 5 per person)
marshmallows (enough for a couple per person, depending on how much of a sugar fiend you are)
dark chocolate, to melt

Thread the fruit and marshmallows onto wooden skewers in a pretty pattern. Place a little chocolate in a ramekin dish, and carefully heat in the microwave, until it melts.

Dip fruit/skewer in chocolate. Eat quickly before anyone else can.

You could also put these on the bbq, if you're a fan of squidgy marshmallows - the pineapple would char nicely. Just don't forget to soak the skewers in water first.

Chocolate pinwheel biscuits

Seeing as it poured down all afternoon, we decided to cheer ourselves up by making some silly biscuits.


This makes lots (about 40-odd). You'll need:

200g butter
150g caster sugar
300g plain flour
25g cocoa
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 egg

Put the oven on at 180 degrees C.

Stick the butter and sugar in the food processor, and blitz until it's all creamed together (try to avoid swearing when the processor trips the electrics in the dodgy plug in the kitchen).

Add the vanilla extract and egg, and blitz again until it's smooth. Pour in the flour (you should probably sift it for maximum effect, but life's too short) and blitz again, until everything comes together into a smooth dough.

Extract half the dough, and stick on a plate. Add the cocoa to the rest, and blitz again. You've now got plain vanilla dough, and chocolate dough.

At this point, you should probably leave both halves of dough in the fridge for half an hour, until they're nicely chilled. If you're working with an overexcited three-year-old, you can safely ignore this bit.

Roll out each half of dough into a long oblong shape, about the thickness of a pound coin. Place the chocolate dough on top of the plain dough - you'll probably have to neaten up the edges and trim a few bits here and there. These bits are ideal for the three-year-old to play with and make some shapes out of.

Roll the two pieces of dough up lengthways into a long sausage (as if you were making a Swiss roll), and wrap in some clingfilm. You really do need to leave this bit in the fridge for at least 10-15 minutes to chill, and become firm.

Taking a really sharp knife, slice the dough into thin discs, and place these on a baking tray (I used a silicon sheet on top so they didn't stick). You'll be pleased to know they don't spread very much, so you can squeeze them in together.

Bake in the oven for 15 minutes or so, until the plain dough has turned golden brown. Turf out onto a wire rack to cool down, and try not to eat them all at once (they'd be lovely with some vanilla or chocolate ice cream).

Pear and chocolate pudding

A beautifully quick recipe (as you'd expect), adapted from Nigella Express. We ate it when Uncle Dom and Auntie Michelle came to stay (and fought them for the leftovers - it makes enough for 6 very large portions).

You'll need:

2 large cans of pear halves (in juice, rather than sugared)
125g plain flour
125g sugar
25 cocoa powder
150g butter
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon bicarbonate of soda
2 eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla extract

First of all, stick the oven on at about 200 degrees C. You'll also need to fish out an ovenproof dish, and grease it with a little butter/oil.

Drain the pears (keep the juice, you might need it later on), and arrange them nicely at the bottom of the dish (you may have to slice some of them in half - mine were huge).

Stick everything else in the food processor (hurrah! no creaming butter and sugar together), and blitz, until you get a brown batter. Ideally it needs to be a soft, dropping consistency - I must have been using quite small eggs, as mine was quite stiff. If that's the case, just add a little of the pear juice, blitz again, and all will be well.

Splodge the batter over the top of the pears (doesn't matter if they poke through - the sponge will rise to cover them), and bake in the oven for 30 minutes (the top should be not too wobbly when you take it out).

Let the pudding stand for 5 or 10 minutes (if you can wait that long), and then divide up. It should be beautifully runny inside - a gorgeous, chocolatey sauce that contrasts really well with the pears.

In fact, I'd go as far as to say that this is the pudding to make for someone who really isn't sure about pears at all - they'll be converted very quickly.

Chocolate and beetroot brownies

This wouldn't have happened, apart from the fact that we had pile of beetroot in the veg box last week, and I can't stand the stuff. It made some very pink brownies, which pleased you no end.

It's adapted from a Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall recipe, as I wasn't brave enough to come up with my own.

You'll need:

125g butter
125g chocolate (plain would be best, I ended up melting down all the rest of the Christmas tree decorations, which weren't)
125g sugar
2 eggs
1 heaped tablespoon cocoa powder
75g self-raising flour
125g cooked/peeled beetroot, whizzed in the food processor

Stick the oven on at about 170 degrees C. You'll need to line a baking tin (I used a square one, about 20cm across) with some greaseproof paper.

Stick the butter and chocolate in a bowl, and put in the microwave in short bursts (15-20 seconds at a time), until its all melted. (You could also do this by balancing a bowl over a pan of hot water, but that takes a lot longer).

Whisk the sugar and eggs together, until they're smooth. Pour in the chocolate/butter, and mix it all together. Add the flour, and fold in the beetroot. Mix - you should now have a bizarrely pink/brown mixture.

Tip into your tin. Bake in the oven for 20-25 minutes, until it starts to look slightly less pink. Leave to cool in the tin. Tastes mostly of chocolate...

Chocolate cherry muffins

Too much work at the moment, so I've not done much baking. But we did manage to make these muffins on Sunday, as they take about five minutes.

You'll need:

150g self-raising flour
75g plain flour
50g cocoa powder
1/2 teaspoon bicarb of soda
220g brown sugar
45g dessicated coconut
125g chopped glace cherries (the natural ones are lovely, but even the bright red ones go well in this)
95g dark chocolate chips (or smashed up pieces of Christmas tree decorations - whatever you've got really)
1 egg, lightly beaten
20g butter, melted
125ml milk
125ml boiling water

First of all, stick your oven on at 180 degrees C, and find your muffin or jam tart tins. Line them with paper (or silicon) cases (three-year-olds are very good at this bit).

Put your flour, cocoa and bicarb into a large mixing bowl, and swish everything about until it turns a nice shade of brown. Stir in the rest of the ingredients (obviously don't mix the egg and the boiling water together or it'll start to cook...do these two separately). Mix well - it'll be quite a sloppy, dark brown batter. Looks disgusting, will taste divine. Trust me.

Spoon the mixture into your cases (I think this amount made about 16 small fairy-cake sized muffins). Bake in the oven for 20 minutes.

Wait until they've cooled before you eat them. This may take some willpower.

Chocolate stars

These cheered your Dad up no end, after a week of flu.

You'll need:

a bar and a half of dark chocolate (about 150g ish)
a small pack of dried cranberries

Break the chocolate up into small pieces, and place in a large bowl. Sit the bowl over a saucepan which contains a couple of inches of water, and turn on the heat. The chocolate will gradually melt - keep stirring it so it doesn't stick on the hot edges of the bowl.

Once you've got molten chocolate, turn off the heat and leave to cool, for 10 minutes or so. Line a baking tray with greaseproof paper, and pour the chocolate (which should be thick but not too drippy) onto the paper. Leave for another 10 minutes, until it's starting to set.

Take one small star cutter, dip in hot water, and use to cut shapes in the chocolate. Quickly push a cranberry into each star.

Leave the chocolate to cool completely - it's often easiest to do this in the fridge. Once it's cold, you can peel the chocolate off the greaseproof paper, and the stars should be easy to push out.

Apricot and chocolate chip muffins

Just the thing for frosty trip north to the Alnwick Garden, to meet up with Santa at the lantern parade.

This made about 16 little cupcake-sized muffins.

You'll need:

150g dried apricots, chopped
500ml boiling water
225g self-raising flour
75g brown sugar
1 egg, lightly beaten
125ml vegetable oil
125-150ml milk
100g chocolate chips (or in our case, leftover mini chocolate Easter eggs gleefully unwrapped from their foil and smashed up into little pieces)

Stick the oven on at about 180 degrees C, and line some cupcake pans with paper cases (that's your job usually).

Add the apricots to half a litre of boiling water, and leave to stand for 5 minutes. Drain, and then stand them on some kitchen paper to absorb the worst of the wet.

Mix the flour, sugar and apricots in a large bowl. Pour everything else in (including the chocolate, assuming you can stop eating it) and give it all a jolly good stir. It'll look supremely revolting.

Using a teaspoon, drop the mixture into the paper cases, and then shove the muffins into the oven for about 15-20 minutes - they're done when the tops are browned.

These are gorgeous when they're still warm and crispy on the top. They freeze well too.

Chocolate cornflake cakes

Yeah, yeah, they're bad for you. But you've got to try them at some point.

You'll need:

100g milk chocolate (we used a leftover Easter egg that we found at the back of the cupboard)
25g butter
1 tsp golden syrup
50g cornflakes

Melt the chocolate and butter in a saucepan, over a very low heat. I suspect this is probably better if you do it in a bain marie - put some water in a pan, suspend a bowl over the top (with the chocolate/butter in), and put on the heat.

Add a teaspoon of golden syrup to the sludgy mixture. Stir. (Don't panic at this point if it all goes wrong and the chocolate mixture separates - we carried on regardless and it all tasted and looked fine.)

Throw in the cornflakes, and swish round with a spoon until they're all coated with chocolate. Spoon into little paper cases, and then put in the fridge to set.

It's easiest if you use cases that will fit into bun tins, and then you can just stick the whole tin, complete with 12 little paper cases, in the fridge.